foods I craved as a kid that taste gross to me now...

On a recent car trip, I was hankering for a snack, and found these. The cheddar club sandwich cracker. Now, it wasn't the crackers with the little bucket of cheese with the plastic red stick, but it was close.

There are a few foods that stick out in my memory as extra-special, that I really craved, mostly because I couldn't have it. Foods I loved, ate as much as I could when I got the chance (begging the little red stick off a friend at school, or from the neighbor down the street.)

It was gross. I opened it up, took two bites and left the rest. M tried it and agreed it was gross. (I didn't use the word "gross" but said it wasn't my favorite and asked if she wanted to try it. She did, and was similarly unimpressed.) I was disappointed. This has happened more often than not over the past year or so. Eating some former "forbidden" food, and realizing- it wasn't "all that."

Keebler cracker sandwich, Twinkies, microwave popcorn, microwave bean burrito, chocolate pudding from a plastic cup... (Note, we did not have a microwave until the 21st century...)

Are there former faves or forbidden foods you realize now are not so yummy?

The best flavor-enhancer is a little bit of "I shouldn't," a dash of "this is so bad," or a pinch of "whoa..."

tomato salads, easy, sweet, kid-friendly

It's tomato time. Cut up tomatoes, a drizzle of sweet balsamic and maybe some olive oil. You can add basil, salt and pepper, fresh mozzarella...

M has always liked this. Introduce it early. It's a great lunch item in a little tupperware with a fork...
reminder, I am out of town...

calcium update and food presentation

I recently was at two events where kids were able to chose foods from a buffet. One was at a friend's afternoon party, another was at a WIC tasting cafe. (Woman, Infants, Children supplemental food program food tasting event.) At my friend's house, there was a bowl of berries, and also fruit kebabs with almost exactly the same fruit. The kids grabbed the kebabs and pretty much ignored the berries. I was helping M with her plate and she said, "No thank you" to a spoon full of berries, but ate about 4 berry kebabs. Similarly with the WIC cafe, the kids gravitated immediately to the fruit kebabs and helped themselves. Many, after checking for permission, came back for seconds and thirds. No one was cajoling or threatening the kids, they gravitated to the fruit and loved it. (I was a little nervous with toddlers walking around with pointy sticks, but all was well!)

On another "presentation" note, I have been sharing my odyssey of my daughter drinking far less milk, and recently also not choosing other calcium-rich foods. I decided to try some go-gurts (she liked them for awhile, then seemed to not eat them as much so I hadn't bought them for some time...) to add to our snack repertoire and she seems to really enjoy them. She hasn't been eating much of the yogurt in a cup, but maybe just the new presentation was a kick-start. Who knows! I presented it as part of snack, in a neutral and pleasant way.

She had two for snack yesterday with strawberries, and two with morning snack with a baggie of Kix-which she didn't eat. I will continue to rotate it through her meals and snacks (dessert one night, or dessert with lunch maybe) as well as cheese, regular yogurt and offering milk. I'll keep you posted...

I also had to remind myself as I was thinking of other foods to offer, that I was limiting her choices based on old exposures. I caught myself saying, "she doesn't like rice pudding" when in reality she had only maybe seen it 4 or 5 times, and the last time was months ago. (One family I worked with, the mom said, "My boys don't like shrimp" and the dad said, "we haven't had shrimp in this house for 5 years," and two of her children were under age 5...) So I bought some rice pudding (which I enjoy :) and offered it. She tried it the other night for dessert and said, "no thanks, I don't like it." Fair enough!

The trap parents can get into is worrying about a certain nutrient or food group. I think I recently blogged about a mom who was worried about her toddler's protein intake and knew he would reliably eat chicken nuggets, so she was serving them most nights. This is how you can start to cone down the foods your child will accept. Feeding from a place of active worry almost as a rule doesn't help, but makes matters worse.

Same for me. I need to now resist the temptation to serve go-gurt three times a day and lose out on variety! Remember what Ellyn says, the child's attitude about eating is more important than what they eat on any given day (or week sometimes!)

Think of a list of foods your child "doesn't like" or "won't eat" or "won't accept." Honestly think back to when the last time was that you offered that food, and try to honestly guess how many total, NEUTRAL exposures your child has had. Maybe it's time to give some of those foods a second (or third, or thirtieth...) chance!

reality bites, why not forbidding "forbidden foods" works

As a child, my parents were pretty strict about all things "crap," from Barbies to food. I have vivid memories of begging FOR YEARS for a slushie. You know, those neon red frozen concoctions. While my friends had Shirley Temples or enjoyed slushies poolside, I coveted and whined. I don't remember my first one, so it couldn't have been that great...

Similarly, I remember a vacation in the New Hampshire mountains with relatives who taught at the ski school. I begged for a giant red sucker ALL WEEK. I finally got it, and it was gross. Plain disappointing. I was so embarrassed, and knew my parents would turn it into a lesson of, "We're never getting you crap again," that I ate most of it, ditching the last bit in a snow bank.

Today M and I were at the mall returning some fancy Stride-rites that had broken after 6 weeks and she started whining for a gumball. "Not now," I said, maybe next time. We passed the machines again and the whining began. "OK, we'll come back after lunch." We had a lovely lunch, and she got a grape gum-ball for dessert with her allowance money. She chewed it, made a face and said, "I thought it would taste better." She chewed a few minutes longer and then spit it out. "I'm sorry it wasn't as good as you hoped." She said she'd try cherry next time. Fine by me.

She has tried and been able to make an honest appraisal (she didn't like or finish) a chocolate and-sprinkle-covered donut, a pink frosted cookie at the school picnic, several kinds of candy from Regina's candy store, Oreos (Paul Newman-Os,) and s'mores. She recently handed over a half-eaten Rice Krispie treat, and even a half-finished ice cream cone, just because she was "full." (Would NOT have stopped me as a kid!)

Allowing children to have access on a fairly regular basis to sweets and treats within the structure of family meals and snacks, presented in a pleasant and neutral way with a variety of other great foods takes their power away. I deal with less whining, I trust her to eat something because it tastes good to her, not because she has to prove a point or craves something that is overly controlled.

Do you have any memories of forbidden fruits not living up to the hype? Foods? Experiences as well? That NKOTB concert you begged to go to? The perm you wanted? Sex?

breaking all the rules...

Count how many "rules" I break in the following narrative of our day. See if we agree at the end...

When I talk to families struggling with feeding, I stress the importance of structure. It is important to offer fat/protein/carb at every meal and snack, roughly every 2-4 hours. Most days I practice what I preach and things go pretty smoothly. Sunday was another matter and an example of how challenging it can be. In an effort to not go crazy indoors, we have been visiting the Oxford pool as M is really into swimming now. (After months of intense fear of getting her head wet.)

Anway. We enjoyed pancakes for breakfast (mostly carbs) with about 1/4 cup of high protein Greek yogurt. I had some business calls (which is rare on a Sunday) and spouse had to work- which is less rare. So, M watched TV with some cut up apples and a big bowl of popcorn which she nibbled from about 10:15-11:30. At this point I was starving so we had lunch around noon. M of course wasn't hungry having grazed all morning, so she had a cucumber with Ranch. (I had whole wheat bread, ham and cheese sandwich, cucumbers, clementines and milk.) Then we went to the pool. By 1:30 she was asking for food. I had packed clementines, a banana and a small rice Krispie treat. (The snack bar there serves popcorn, nachos, ice-cream and cookies...) She ate the Rice Krispie treat, half a clementine and then was dying to get back in the water. By 3:15 she was crying that she was hungry, which considering that she had had a mini cucumber and rice krispie treat in the last 4 hours was understandable. (For those of you who have heard me talk or read Child of Mine, imagine what her little blood sugar charting would have looked like. Probably crashing right around then.)

So we got home, she had some TLC crackers, cream cheese and a clementine. Then rushed off to church where they gave her a snack of raisins at 4:45, then home for dinner which was cut up veggies and dip, a salsa-based stew which turned out to be really spicy so we gave her left over mac -n-cheese (we had no fresh bread available.)

We ended up with a really haphazard day which felt off and chaotic. She didn't have time to sit and tune in to hunger (TV, the draw of the pool, rushing to church, then a snack on a snack.) Then I broke the cardinal rule and let her eat separate food (short order cook.)

So, we all have crazy days, and break the rules– but I'm not worried. It was an aberration, it wasn't alot of fun. It will happen again, but not too often I hope! Nobody is perfect, nobody has to be perfect. Do the best you can, be honest if you think you can do better, and realize that part of eating normally is "breaking the rules" sometimes.

What days like this in fact do is remind me of how much better our days are when we sit down to eat without distraction, take our time and have balanced offerings. It's a great motivator to keep up all that work.

"mistake" count: TV, rushing, did not offer protein with snack, short-order cooked, let her decide when to eat (though this was a byproduct of our off-schedule morning grazings)

6 and counting probably...

new yogurt love

I LOVE this product. It's a little pricey, but I usually take two sittings to eat one. (I like to eat half at breakfast with toast and/or an egg and fruit, and the rest with a snack later in the day.) Its FAGE, but pronounced Fa-ye. It's the Greek yogurt which means it has lots of protein which is important for long-lasting, even energy (10 grams per package.) Don't forget every meal and snack needs to offer fat, protein and carb. This would be great for a kid who might not be into eggs or peanut butter for breakfast.

I love the creamy texture and flavor. It feels very rich and it fills me up, unlike most yogurt. I can also add as much of the fruit flavor as I want, so I use a little less than the full amount so it's not too sweet.

It's a little gimmicky, but the fruit ones have a little cup of fruit that you mix in. My 4 year old thought that was neat, and since she is choosing milk over water these days, this is a nice source of calcium too. I buy the 2% so that there is some fat in there as well.

You can get them at Target, Whole Foods, Lunds and more. They are pretty pricey, so I stock up when they go on sale.

Let me know what you think!

"Nectarines are gross!!!!"

So it's a little awkward when you are the "feeding expert" and your kid is having a major meltdown at preschool pickup over what you brought for snack. My child, like her mother and her mother's mother likes food. Perhaps out of guilt or joy at seeing her happy after school I had relied too much recently on the home-made oatmeal cookies for the after school snack. I also generally want something I know she will likely eat since we go play at the park after school and dinner isn't often until 6:45. So today I decide snack is graham crackers (not a favorite) a cut up nectarine (which she normally loves) and a milk box. She asks what I brought right away. I tell her and she loses her stuff in the middle of the lobby. "I hate nectarines! They're gross! Is that all you brought! AHHHHH!!!!" I smile politely, nodding the mommy nod to the other mommies, "You know how it goes, eh?" The screaming continues to the parking lot where I get a couple inquiring looks, and in the car where we usually have a nice chat while she eats a quiet snack before the park. I actually stand outside the car while she thrashes around crying inside.

It's just a sandwich-or is it?

All she wants is a sandwich. Reasonable it seems, but it feels so wrong. I can't give in, even if it's only a sandwich. Why does this push my buttons? Because if I had gone home to make her a sandwich I would have violated one of the rules of the Division of Responsibility. I decide what she gets to chose from, she decides if she eats it. It wasn't about nectarines. It was seeing if she could win, if she could decide what she got to eat– if she could pitch a big enough fit so that I always brought cookies and treats.A few minutes later we were parked outside our favorite park, sharing a milk box and graham crackers. She admitted the nectarine was really good and ripe and was mad that I had to eat a piece to get the top on the tupperware to fit. Kids will pitch fits, will manipulate– it's their job. It's our job to feed them well, to step back when we're annoyed and ask why is this such a struggle right now? What is going on? Stick to your guns. Remember, your job is to decide what, when and where kids eat, it's the kids job to decide if and how much.

"But, you don't like tomatoes"

And other things better left unsaid...

Plus garden update!

So, what survived the early bunny onslaught is now coming ripe in our tiny backyard garden. I have to say, M is so excited by the cherry tomatoes that she's out there checking them twice a day. We've probably gotten about 3 dozen so far, with lots of little green ones coming. She eats them with breakfast, dinner, snack... We've also have about 5 cucumbers, and one green pepper. I'm not sure if it is supposed to be green, or if it was one of the yellow and orange ones we planted but just not yet ripe... I'm learning as I go! We've had so much fun that I'm preparing a larger plot to plant twice the tomato plants next year-Dad and I would like to eat a few once in awhile!

Talking about food

Today we were at Eagle's Nest in New Brighton (a favorite indoor romp area for our third day of rainy weather.) I packed some cherry tomatoes, sugar snap peas from the farmer's market and Ranch in a little tupperware. I also had Kettle Corn on hand. M started in on the tomatoes and peas. A little boy sitting nearby said, "I want some of those!" and his mom replied, "But you don't even like tomatoes!" A normal reaction, but a lost opportunity.

Perhaps reframe like this...

"They do look yummy! Want to get some next time we're at the store?"

"Aren't they a pretty color? They match your T-shirt!"

"We haven't thought about having them with dip before, that would be fun to try!"

As it was, it was our last one, or I would have happily offered to share. Just a reminder that there are lots of opportunities to frame food talk in positive ways-the essence of "nutrition education" for children.

frozen bananas and pistachios

We've been enjoying frozen bananas as summer snacks. I freeze them peeled in a baggie (they need to be ripe, but not overly ripe as they get brown and slimy...) She enjoys letting them thaw a little and then using one of her Ikea knives to cut them into pieces. You could mash them for kids new to finger foods. they gat a creamy consistency like ice-cream almost. We continue to enjoy frozen blueberries and are looking forward to trying frozen grapes. (Remember that nuts and grapes and blueberries are not appropriate for very small children unless prepared properly for their skill level-ie grapes quartered...) 

M hasn't taken to nuts very quickly which is sad as they are such a wholesome treat to add to snacks with protein and good fats. (Remember every snack and meal should offer fat, protein and carb.) We bought a massive bag of pistachios from Sams Club and have offered them over several days. Today she rejoiced that she could crack them open and ate several without comment. Pistachios are a great nut for "picky" kids. The act of opening them makes them "fun," and for kids who like saltier things, its a great intro to nuts. 

"kid-friendly" food

This kind of picture makes me wary. One cherry for the nose, a single grape cut in half for eyes. A truly picky eater would not be tricked into eating healthy by a smiley face, and a child is not learning to grow up and eat the foods you eat if you're running around making clown faces or ants on a log. Don't get me wrong, its OK to have fun with food. Decorate birthday cupcakes like lady-bugs, see who can crunch the loudest, have the pinkest tongue from your beet salad...

Making food entertaining to get a kid to eat one grape is not the way to instill a true love of variety. And you're working too hard if you have to make every meal into a piece of art to "get a piece of fruit" into your kid. Its pressure, and it slows down the process of learning to love new foods.How about a big bowl of grapes out of the fridge, or cherries in season (watch pits for younger kids...) 

What happened at our house this weekend.

Recently M had some rice-krispie from a restaurant lunch she had saved for snack. She was pestering me before snack. "I can eat it all, right Mom?" I replied "we'll see, we have lots of great stuff." No fight (remember, don't get sucked-in!) As we sat down to luscious red watermelon with its gorgeous green rind, she got to choose slices instead of chunks and barely touched her rice-krispie treat. It was a pleasant snack. Several points: demistify dessert, honor whole foods and variety, enjoy the amazing variety of fruits and vegetables, have fruits and vegetables on hand and offer them often, don't fight or negotiate of bargain. Do it again and again.

Remark about how beautiful and red cherries are on their own, dip them in yogurt, or make a sauce to top ice-cream for dessert. Good food is brilliant and amazing on its own. 

the package and the reality, Trader Joes rice...

So Trader Joe's finally opened near us after months of driving past it and watching the building process. I'd heard so much hype that I went in with M after camp one day. It was convenient because I forgot to pack her snack. We started on a banana and sipped a yogurt smoothie while we made our way through the crowded store. (Yes, I was one of those moms who let her kid eat "pre-purchase," but they  do sell bananas by the piece. 19 cents each...)

Anyway, we got their "vegetable" fried rice and noted that there were far fewer veggies in my bowl versus on the package. M declared it delicious however, so we might get it again but will have to make veggies or serve fruit on the side...

I prefer their Spanikopita to Whole Foods, mostly because it comes in its own foil tray which makes for easy  clean-up. 

Overall, not so wowed that I'll brave the traffic, complete with 2 cops, to go back, but will go back when I have more time to look at other things. My mom says her local TJs  has "Heppenheim" white wine for $6.99 which is from my mom's home town in Germany where her family belonged to the wine co-op. (Families bring their grapes in and get a share.) I tried it many years ago and thought it was good, and how cool to have a personal connection!

Do any of you have Trader Joe products you enjoy?

Yuck: how to handle food rejection

The other day I picked up M from preschool/daycare. Because we eat dinner late (6:30-6:45) so that we can eat with Dad, I always bring a snack. Some days its hard to try to get the protein, fat and carb together and eggs are a wonderful, handy, complete option to include. I often hard-boil half a dozen and use them for snacks, or in potato salad etc. 

Last week, after happily eating eggs (only the white actually) I brought one to school and peeled it and offered it. M grimaced and said "Ew, its stinks, I don't want it!" I held back form what I wanted to say which was, "Give me a break, you love eggs, you ate one happily two days ago, I packed it, you're going to eat it!" 

She drank some milk and nibbled on a few crackers.

This week again I went to grab an egg and almost didn't. "She doesn't like it, why waste it again?" I thought. Then I remembered what I tell clients and parents, "Continue to rotate "rejected" foods regularly through meals and snacks."

I brought the egg, she ate it without complaint, along with an orange and water. Just goes to show, kids are funny, finicky, irrational. Keep rotating foods through, and try to remain neutral when they say and do wacky things with food. Do you have any stories about foods your kids loved then hated? Did you keep offering it?